Wrap your fuzzy with a big red bow, Paris.

…’cause you’re goin’ to jail. 

From the Countdown with Keith Olbermann email newsletter:

“The many moods of Paris Hilton shifted again when the jail-bound socialite rehired the publicist she blamed for her 45-day sentence. Hilton has called the sentence unfair, and her fans have posted a petition on the Internet urging Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger to pardon her. The petition, which had more than 900 signatures by Tuesday morning, urges the California actor-turned-governor to pardon Hilton because she provides “beauty and excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives.”

[edit…]

In an interview for the June issue of Harper’s Bazaar, Hilton says: “I get in more trouble just because of who I am. The cops do it all the time. They’ll just pull me over to hit on me.”

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/18552256/

I think we should start a petition to lengthen her jail time.

(Video NSFW or kids.)

At the 0:40 mark (or 2:30 remaining, depending on how you see it) I do believe that’s Peter Stickles from Short Bus. You think?

I really wanted to find a Scissor Sisters video with this part in it by Ana Matronic:

“Every day and every night the people they say to me:

Ana, thank you for the beautiful work that you be doing for our people, because everytime you get out of your corvette stingray in your white pumps and your pink acid wash jeans with the matching pink rabbit fur coat…

we say: miss thang you got it going on… you is gorgeous.’

and i say:

i am so proud to serve you people, because i know that with my looks i can achieve anything in this world. yes i´ve got that revlon contract, and oh yes thank you i’ll take that record contract too because you know what? I’m gorgeous. and my job with my gorgeousness is to serve the people.. serve… and i serve some more. Yes thank you ladies and gentlemen for letting me do my beautiful work in beautifying this beautiful world that is already, already so pretty!!!”

Maybe I’ll just MAKE something myself. Check back to see if I get around to it. In the meantime, you can listen to it HERE.